Wednesday, May 30, 2012

my job

Heyyooo readers. 


Now that I'm done school for the summer, and have returned home, I picked back up the job that I had last summer, and I looked through my posts and was surprised that I had never mentioned it before. I work at a little convenience-store/ take out food place. As weird as that sounds it is exactly what it sounds like. In the front, there is a convenience store, full of candy, pop, canned goods...ohh and liquor and beer, because it is in Quebec. But in the back, we have a kitchen, equipped with french-fryers, pizza ovens, a meat slicer, a grill...you name it we have it. The only crappy part is that usually only one person has to work both the kitchen and the store at the same time. To get to this job of mine, I have to drive 40 minutes, from my house in Ontario.  


This spot is in the middle of nowhere, and is right before you head into the bush. It is pretty much a last stop before you leave civilization, and because of this we get tons of customers. A few of these customers live around the area and are what we call "regulars". These regulars are quite funny, and you get to know the customers and what kind of cigarettes they buy very quickly. This is where my post really begins. I would like to detail three customers in particular to you, with no names of course.  And I guess it should be mentioned that what ties these customers together, and sets them apart, is they have a romantic interest in me, and are quite obvious about it...

Bachelor #1: 


Let's call him Steve. Steve is a 20 year old boy, the same age as  me. Steve is funny and nice, in an awkward way. He tries a little too hard though, which makes my night usually (because I work mostly the evening shift). He is a regular, and he lives somewhere around the store.  I can tell he likes me, as he will come in 8 times a night...and each trip just get something meaningless as a chocolate bar and talk to me for five minutes each time. It is rather flattering, and kind of ridiculous. 


Bachelor #2:


Let's call him Trevor. Trevor is a 30ish year old man. Last summer he came in all the time and just talked to me, like everyone else.  We would joke together, but that was it. I thought that was it. It was the last shift I worked and he asked me if I had a boyfriend, and I said no...and that is when he asked me out on a date....well asked me to go fishing. First of all, I fucking hate fishing. It is the most boring pastime in the world. AND i hate the taste of fish, so even if I caught anything I wouldn't eat it in a  million years. I kinda didn't know what to say, as this came out of nowhere. He got a little angry at my not immediate yes, and threw a piece of paper at me and left....it had his phone number on it. I am not as comfrotable with this interest as I am with Steve's. Firstly, I don't know exactly how old Trevor is. Secondly, he is recently divorced and I love his ex-wife. Thirdly, and most importantly, I DON"T FIND HIM ATTRACTIVE OR WANT ANYTHING ROMANTIC TO DO WITH HIM.  I was fine talking and joking a little bit whenever he came into the store, but to see him outside of work is not ok with me. 


Bachelor #3:


For our purposes his name will be Al. Al is a 70-something old man. He comes in with his daughter and grandson all the time, almost everyday. If he sees that I am working, and working alone, he will come back later in the evening to "talk" to me. Last summer I was naive and innocent. He would ask for a hug and I would give it to him, as he is an old man. He is older than my grandfather, so I figured why not. Bad decision. Last summer during a hug, I felt his hand graze over my bum. I pulled away quickly, but figured it was just an accident and forgot it....it so wasn't. Every time he saw me and tried to hug me I would get my ass groped. As if that isn't creepy enough, it gets worse.  This one time last summer he tried to kiss me on the mouth--when I pulled away and freaked out, he said "What's the matter, it's not like I'm trying to sleep with ya". Too creepy for words. I put my foot down and said no more hugs, or anything. He had other plans. On my last shift before I returned to Ottawa to go to school he handed me his phone number, telling me to phone him and check in. I swear my eye started twitching as I stared at him in disbelief. He left soon after. I threw his number out, left for Ottawa, and forgot about him. When I returned to do a few shifts over Christmas break, he was back and had a knot in his face at the fact that I never called him. I told him I didn't think it was appropriate and he got super pissed and walked out. I thought it was the end of it.
Fast-forward to this year:
For the first few shifts I worked he treated me like I didn't exist, like I was a robot to ring in his purchases and give him his lotto tickets, which suited me just fine.  Then he got it in his head that we were "Friends" again. He started talking to me again, and I knew this was where trouble started, but I can't be rude to a customer. (ohh and my boss knows all about him. as I am not the first young female employee he has done this to) And then last shift he gave me this weird from the back hug which sent my skin crawling and made me want to vomit.  He asked me on a date as well, which is too fucked up for words. My gag-reflex is going at just the thought of him. 


So if these are my three options I'll just go kill myself now. These guys are the reason that I sometimes hate my job at the store. They create awkward and uncomfortable situations that I shouldn't have to deal with. I don't even live around there. 


So that is my story, and the sad truth about the men I attract. Do you have any creepy, or a little too interested people visiting you at your place of work? Please comment and let me know. 


xoxoxo
Becca

Monday, May 21, 2012

I Feel OLD

Hello Readers, if you still exist. I wouldn't blame you for leaving me as I have abandoned you, especially recently. However, now that it is summer break i plan on posting and updating my blog and expressing my thoughts over this forum. 


The topic on the discussion board for today, is how old I feel. For new readers, or those who don't know much about me, I will be turning 20 in July. This fact scares me shitless. I don't know why I believe it is such a big deal, but I believe it is. I feel old, being alive for two decades. I tell my 88 year old grandmother this and she laughs at me, which i fully deserve. I think the part that bothers me the most is loosing the "teen" title after my age. I technically became an adult when I turned 18, but the "teen" was still there so it wasn't serious, or really legitimate. However, now that I will be turning 20 that suffix won't be attached to my age anymore. I feel as though I am losing a part of my life, and closing a chapter of it that I am not quite ready to let go of, (thank goodness I still have a few months to go). I feel as though I will be losing the semi carefree nature of my life, and some youth and exuberance. Shit gets serious after 20. Some twenty year-olds are done school and start entering the workforce, another scary fact. Thank god that I still have plenty more years of schooling ahead of me. 


Another thing that makes me feel old is that some of my friends are getting married. Married at 20, I don't know if it is just me, but I am in no way, shape or form to be ready for that kind of commitment right at this point in my life. Last year my friend Kelsey got married, and now has a baby, and as of a few days ago my friend Katherine is married as well. Both Kelsey and Katherine are happy with their choices, and I couldn't be happier for them...but I know that life is not for me. I feel as though I am still finding myself and I really don't think I could do that will a permanent attachment to me (I know people will tell me that divorce is always an option, but I only plan on getting married once, and staying that way...call me old-fashioned if you want). I just feel that these girls are rushing things a little bit, they are 20 and 21, still have plenty of time for husbands and babies. It makes me feel kinda like an old spinster. Single me, working away at school, nowhere close to being married and scared shitless at the thought of children especially birthing children. It kind of feels like my biological clock has been ticking faster lately, and I know that it really isn't. I realize that everyone is different, but I can't help comparing my life to theirs and I can't honestly tell you who's life is better. All of us would have different opinions and each of our lives would have negative and positive features. Regardless of that, the fact that my two friends are married makes me feel like an old spinster...at 19 and 10/12 years of age. 


 My two friends are done college now, and will be starting working in their fields, and I feel as though I am still a child. Going to school everyday, complaining about the amount of homework I have, and school related things, while they are working in their fields, already having completed their school. I realize that my program and aspirations will take longer to achieve, but I don't come here to talk logic, I'm here to babble on about my insane thoughts. I feel as though my daily routine isn't as serious as theirs and therefore less adult, and I feel as though I should be more adult...which I physically cannot be. This scares me because I feel like I am  losing touch with my peers, people from my own generation and upbringing. It is sort of an alienating feeling really, knowing that I can't relate to the pressures of married life, or of legitimate employment beyond that of a part time job. This time is scary, a time of significant change for everyone my age, and I know I am not the only one dreading their upcoming birthday. I feel like life is slipping away, (which sounds like something an older person would say but it is true) and because of this I feel OLD.


Thanks for reading my rant, and I logically realize that I am still a spring chicken, but sometimes I do not feel it. I hope you all are doing well.


P.S. I would like to again congratulate Kelsey and Katherine on their marriages, and wish both couples a life full of love.


XOXOXO Becca